Absolute's Toys (Globals)

Absolute MUSH has a system of globals that many people can't remember,
so this page was designed to aid them in helping them do just that.

First of all, a little cut'n'paste from the MUSH itself...
Global action commands are for just for fun. They allow players to perform actions such as hugging, tickling, poking, or waving at other players. When one player uses a global action command, both that player and the target player recieve messages showing the acting player's action and the recieving player's response. Each player inherits a set of default responses, but players may customize their responses if they wish.
For more help, try +help globals on the MUSH. You can also access a listing
of the globals available when you're on Absolute Mush by typing +help g-list

A neat trick with globals is the ability to customise the responses depending on the name, or sex of the enactor. Lets take 'cuddle' for example:

&OCuddle me=switch(get(*%N/sex),M*,doesnt hug blokes!,cuddles %N warmly.)

When cuddled by someone who is male, the response will be '[Yourname] doesnt hug blokes!' and when when cuddled by someone who is not male, the response will be '[Yourname] cuddles [MUSHer] warmly'

You can also try customising responses for that special someone, by switch()ing with '%N' and not the get(*%N/sex). Confused? Sorry.
[MUSHer] would be your name, and [victim] the name of the person receiving the global, eg:
Ian yells "Hey DUdE" at Mike! Mike is one kewl DUdE!

A
adore		[MUSHer] adores everything about [victim]! [victim] is totally adorable!!.
answerme		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and screams "ANSWER ME!"! [victim] steps back in alarm and surprise.
antiheart		[MUSHer] passes [victim] a jagged obsidian candy heart! [victim] reads it "GO AWAY"
applaude		[MUSHer] claps and cheers for [victim]! [victim] bows and loves all the attention.
appreciate		[MUSHer] appreciates [victim]'s concern! [victim] smiles.
aspirin		[MUSHer] gives a few aspirin to [victim]! [victim] washes them down with a glass of water.
aww		[MUSHer] awwwwws [victim]! [victim] smiles coz he feels better!!
B
baa		[MUSHer] baa's at [victim]! [victim] bleats back and bounces in the meadow
beat		[MUSHer] takes out a big stick and beats [victim]! [victim] is more in tune with other's needs now.
belt		[MUSHer] belts [victim] around the head!! [victim] sniffles and cries at [MUSHer].
bip		[MUSHer] bips [victim]! [victim] apologises to [MUSHer].
birthday		[MUSHer] wishes [victim] a Happy Birthday! [victim] smiles "Thanks!"
bite		[MUSHer] sinks his teeth into [victim]'s neck! [victim] screams at [MUSHer] the vampyre!
bits		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] has very nice bits! [victim] thanks you for the compliment.
bkiss		[MUSHer] blows [victim] a kiss! [victim] jumps up and catches it.
bleh		[MUSHer] blehs at [victim]! [vicitm] blehs back at you.
blat		[MUSHer] pulls out his blat bat and hits [victim]! [victim] is well and truly BLAT-BATTED !!!
blink		[MUSHer] blinks at [victim]! [victim] blinkety blinks back at ya !
blur		[MUSHer] sings Blur's "Blue Jeans" to [victim]! [victim] taps his foot approvingly.
blush		[MUSHer] blushes at [victim]! [victim] basks in the warm glow.
bomb		[MUSHer] throws a bomb at [victim]! [victim] screams and runs in the opposite direction but gets caught in the blast.
bonk		[MUSHer] BONKS [victim]! [victim] OIFs!
boo		[MUSHer] BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO's [victim]! [victim] jumps clean out of his skin!!
bop		[MUSHer] bops [victim]! [victim] is stunned to silence!
bounce		[MUSHer] bounces [victim]! [victim] bounces all around the room!!
bow		[MUSHer] bows before [victim]! [victim] looks at [MUSHer] with a regal stare.
brb		[MUSHer] will be back in a minute "so don't go away [victim]"! [victim] okie-dokies, "See you soon"
bunjee		[MUSHer] bunjee jumps from the top of [victim]'s head!! [victim] gasps as [MUSHer] is catapulted back up into the air!
burp		[MUSHer] burps at [victim]! [victim] looks at [MUSHer] disgustedly.
bwaa		[MUSHer] bwaa haa haas at [victim]! [victim] frowns and sighs.
bye		[MUSHer] waves "Bye" to [victim]! [victim] waves back.
C
caress		[MUSHer] caresses [victim]! [victim] rubs his face into [MUSHer]'s hand.
chars		[MUSHer] says "Chars" to [victim]! [victim] says "It was nothing."
chase		[MUSHer] mercilessly chases [victim]! [victim] heads for the hills.
cheeky		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] is being cheeky! [victim] probably is, yes.
cheerup		[MUSHer] tells [victim] to cheer up! [victim] tries his hardest to.
chiggy		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is a chiggy gi'! [victim] is the chiggiest gi' that there is.
choccie		[MUSHer] senses [victim] is in need of calorific bliss!! [victim] is fed choccie by [MUSHer] until he is fit to burst!
clap		[MUSHer] claps [victim]! [victim] bows!
closet		[MUSHer] shoves [victim] into the closet and slams the door! [victim] bangs and screams "Lemme outta here!"
club		[MUSHer] clubs [victim]! [victim] gets a bloody face.!!
coffee		[MUSHer] pours a fresh coffee for [victim]! [victim] begins to awaken.
coin		[MUSHer] tosses a coin for [victim]! [victim] watches as it comes up heads.
collapse		[MUSHer] collapses into the arms of [victim]! [victim] lies [MUSHer] down and runs for help!
comfort		[MUSHer] comforts [victim]! [victim] feels a little better!!
confuse		[MUSHer] confuses the heck outta [victim]! [victim] was confused enough already!!
crackle		[MUSHer] shoves [victim]'s fingers in an electric socket! [victim] crackles with bright blue sparks!
crush		[MUSHer] has a crush on [victim]! [victim] blushes and thinks you're sweet!
cry		[MUSHer] cries pitifully at [victim]! [victim] comforts [MUSHer]!
cuddle		[MUSHer] cuddles [victim]! [victim] cuddles up close.
cute		[MUSHer] reckons [victim] is cute! [victim] blushes "Gee thanks [MUSHer]"
D
daft		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] is daft! [victim] is completely daft!
dance		[MUSHer] dances with [victim]! [victim] twirls around merrily with [MUSHer]!
deathstar		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and says "You may fire when ready [victim]! victim] targets the Death Star beam on a small peace loving planet and blows it to dust!
degauss		[MUSHer] degausses [victim]! [victim] gets a damn good degaussing.
discon		[MUSHer] just got disconnected there, [victim]! [victim] did wonder.
ditto		[MUSHer] doesn't know the command for the global which [victim] just used so says "ditto" instead! [victim] does whatever response he would have done, had he known the command.
doh		[MUSHer] shouts "D'oh!" at [victim]! [victim] tsks.
doing		[MUSHer] points at [victim]'s @doing and giggles! [victim] smiles "Thanks, I thought it was pretty funny too!"
dontap		[MUSHer] tells [victim] not to apologise! [victim] apologises for apologising.
dote		[MUSHer] dotes on [victim]! [victim] is doted right up to the eyeballs!
drink		[MUSHer] takes a drink from [victim]! [victim] shrieks and wonders where you're drinking from !!!!!!!!
drool		[MUSHer] drools over [victim]! [victim] gets deeply embarrassed.
drunkme		[MUSHer] hiccups drunkenly at [victim]! [victim] thinks you should sober up!
drunkyou		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] is completely drunk! [victim] ishnt honesht. hic
dude		[MUSHer] yells "Hey DUdE" at [victim]! [victim] is one kewl DUdE!
duh		[MUSHer] duh's [victim]! [victim] feels stoopid!!
dump		[MUSHer] is away to take a dump, [victim]! [victim] thanks you for sharing that with him.
dunk		[MUSHer] shoves [victim]'s head into a bucket of water! [victim] splutters and gasps for breath!
dwha		[MUSHer] didn't want her anyway, [victim]! [victim] looks unconvinced.
dynamite		[MUSHer] places a big stick of dynamite next to [victim] and hops away! [victim] is blown into the sky by the explosion.
E
eat		[MUSHer] licks his lips and takes a bite outta [victim]! [victim] enjoys being eaten.
eep		[MUSHer] eeps at [victim]! [victim] is more shocked than [MUSHer]!!!!!!!!!!!!!
eh		[MUSHer] questions [victim] "Eh?"! [victim] thinks it's obvious!
erk		[MUSHer] erks at [victim]! [victim] raises an eyebrow.
eyes		[MUSHer] rolls his eyes at [victim]! [victim] picks them up and passes them back!
F
fan		[MUSHer] grabs a fan and fans [victim]! [victim] wows at all the cool air.
fedup		[MUSHer] is getting fed up of all this global spamming from [victim]! [victim] is provoked to further echelons of spammage.
fkiss		[MUSHer] french kisses [victim]! [victim] melts as he returns the long deep kiss.
flame		[MUSHer] breathes fire on [victim]! [victim] is mere charcoal....
flirt		[MUSHer] flirts happily with [victim]! [victim] looks disinterested.
fluffy		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] is really fluffy! [victim] fluffies and floats around!
fly		[MUSHer] flies his Star Destroyer at [victim]! [victim] says whoowwhh as it narrowly misses him!
fool		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and cries "You fool!"! [victim] admits that this is so.
foolish		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is foolish! [victim] often is.
forgive		[MUSHer] happily forgives [victim]! [victim] is glad to be forgiven!
freeze		[MUSHer] pushes [victim] into the freezer and shuts the door! [victim] ends up looking like an ice-pop!
frog		[MUSHer] frogs [victim]! [victim] looks like a wide eyed frog!
fuzzle		[MUSHer] fuzzles [victim]'s hair! [victim] is fuzzled!
G
gag		[MUSHer] gags [victim]! [victim] grunts erotically though the gag.
giggle		[MUSHer] giggles at [victim]! [victim] giggles back childishly.
global		[MUSHer] does an annoying global on [victim]! [victim] is globalled, annoyingly.
glower		[MUSHer] glowers darkly at [victim]! [victim] feels suitably admonished.
goose		[MUSHer] gracefully reaches forward thumb first til he achieves intimate contact with the posterior of [victim]! [victim] never jumped quite that high!
greet		[MUSHer] nods a greeting to [victim]! [victim] nods one back.
grin		[MUSHer] grins wickedly at [victim]! [victim] uhohs...
grovel		[MUSHer] grovels to [victim]! [victim] considers [MUSHer]'s plea for mercy.
grumble		[MUSHer] grumbles at [victim]! [victim] doesn't give a toss.
H
hair		[MUSHer] gently strokes [victim]'s hair! [victim] smiles.
handcuff		[MUSHer] handcuffs [victim]! [victim] feels kinda trapped!
heart		[MUSHer] passes [victim] a green candy heart! [victim] reads it "ASK ME"
hi5		[MUSHer] hi5s [victim]! [victim] is hi5'ed!
hiccup		[MUSHer] hiccups at [victim]! [victim] giggles and suggests a shock.
hide		[MUSHer] hides from [victim]! [victim] looks behind things warily.
hiya		[MUSHer] waves "Hiya" to [victim]! [victim] waves right back.
hmm		[MUSHer] hmms at [victim]! [victim] wonders why [MUSHer]'s making strange noises!
hold		[MUSHer] holds [victim]! [victim] is held tight in [MUSHer]'s arms.
honk		[MUSHer] honks [victim]'s nose! [victim] goes HHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!!
hosepipe		[MUSHer] pulls out a hosepipe and sprays [victim] with cold water! [victim] screams as the water hits him!
hsrug		[MUSHer] hsrugs at [victim]! [victim] assumes that was meant to be a shrug.
hug		[MUSHer] hugs [victim]! [victim] is huggable!!
hugtight		[MUSHer] hugs [victim] tight! [victim] hugs you back.
huh		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and says "Uh Huh Huh"! [victim] laughs and says "Oh nooooo!" in an Elvis-esque manner.
hum		[MUSHer] hums a tune for [victim]! [victim] doesnt know the words either!
I
ignore		[MUSHer] ignores [victim]! [victim] sighs as [MUSHer] isn't paying the slightest attention to him.
indianburn		[MUSHer] sings neener neener as he twists his hands in opposite directions giving adelicious indian burn to [victim]! [victim] groans.
insult		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and cries "You drooling moron"! [victim] looks suitably offended.
ish		[MUSHer] shrugs at [victim] and says "Ish"! [victim] nods vaguely.
J
jack		[MUSHer] shouts "Drink!" at [victim]! [victim] shouts "Girls!" at [MUSHer]!
jello		[MUSHer] squishes Jello in [victim]'s hair! [victim] shakes most of it out but some gets stuck "ICK!"
jukebox		[MUSHer] dedicates a (random) jukebox song to [victim]! [victim] listens as it plays #189-"Roll With It" by Oasis. The jukebox global is a little different to the rest - see note below.
K
kick		[MUSHer] kicks [victim] in the shins! [victim] screams "OUCH!!!..I'm gunna get you for that."
kilt		[MUSHer] puts a kilt on [victim]! [victim] does the highland fling!
kiss		[MUSHer] kisses [victim]! [victim] is kissed!
L
lag		[MUSHer] lags real bad compared to [victim]! [victim] doesn't lag so nerrrrrrr!
lard		[MUSHer] shouts "Lard is good! EAT LARD!" to [victim]! [victim] groans. "Oh no. The gospel of scoob is spreading!"
lart		[MUSHer] administers a suitable LART to [victim]! [victim] has his Luser Attitude suitably Re-adjusted.
laser		[MUSHer] shoots [victim] with a silly little laser gun thing! [victim] loses points as his backpack makes bleeping noises.
later		[MUSHer] tips his cap and says "later!" to [victim]! [victim] acknowledges [MUSHer]!
lathe		[MUSHer] lathes [victim]! [victim] screams and places his hands over his face before collapsing.
laugh		[MUSHer] laughs happily at [victim]! [victim] laughs back with a sparkle in his eye.
les		[MUSHer] says Les to [victim]! [victim] gets blinded by a twin bolt of lightning!
lick		[MUSHer] licks [victim]! [victim] is licked from head to toe!!
love		[MUSHer] loves [victim]! [victim] feels all warm and snuggly.
lunch		[MUSHer] goes for lunch, [victim]! [victim] feels a bit hungry too.
M
macho		[MUSHer] asks [victim] "Over Macho Grande?"! [victim] doesn't think he will ever get over Macho Grande.
massage		[MUSHer] massages [victim]! [victim] 's neck and shoulders feel relaxed and much better then before. Thankyou [MUSHer].
mc		[MUSHer] challenges [victim] to a game of Mornington Crescent! [victim] is afraid that he doesn't know the rules.
medicine		[MUSHer] gives [victim] some medicine.! [victim] starts to get better
meep		[MUSHer] meeps at [victim]! [victim] wiggles his nose and goes "meep meep!"
mega		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] is mega! [victim] thinks you could be right!
meow		[MUSHer] meows at [victim]! [victim] shows [MUSHer] the cat-flap!
milk		[MUSHer] milks [victim]! [victim] ooohs at the pleasure!!
mingin		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is mingin'! [victim] thinks that you're gankin'!
mint		[MUSHer] passes [victim] a white Trebor Extra Strong mint! [victim] reads it "Trebor Extra Strong"
miss		[MUSHer] misses [victim]! [victim] sighs and will see you soon!.
missed		[MUSHer] really missed you, [victim]! [victim] missed you too, [MUSHer].
moo		[MUSHer] moos at [victim]! [victim] honks his horn at the [MUSHer]cow!
moose		[MUSHer] does a silly imitation of a moose at [victim]! [victim] runs away yelling "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!"
mud		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is probably MUDding! [victim] looks up innocently and hides a sword behind his back.
mug		[MUSHer] mugs [victim]! [victim] chases after [MUSHer] "Come back!"
music		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] has good taste in music! [victim] agrees with you.
N
nibble		[MUSHer] nibbles on [victim]! [victim] melts as his earlobe is nibbled.
nkiss		[MUSHer] softly kisses [victim] on the neck! [victim] hugs you tight.
no		[MUSHer] shouts "Oi! [victim]! No!!"! [victim] leaves it.
nod		[MUSHer] nods in the general direction of [victim]! [victim] nods back in acknowledgement!
noogie		[MUSHer] decides to noogie his victim, screwing his knuckles into the skull of poor [victim]! [victim] sulks off into a corner dejectedly.
nudge		[MUSHer] nudges [victim] "wink, wink, nudge, nudge"! [victim] knows what you mean!
nuzzle		[MUSHer] nuzzles [victim]! [victim] feels all warm and cuddly
O
oasis		[MUSHer] sings Oasis's "(What's The Story) Morning Glory" to [victim]! [victim] taps his foot approvingly.
P
paint		[MUSHer] drizzles chocolate body paint all over [victim]! [victim] screams in pleasure.
pants		[MUSHer] displays his pants to [victim]! [victim] is very impressed!
paper		[MUSHer] screws up a piece of paper and throws it at [victim]! [victim] is stunned!
pedant		[MUSHer] gives [victim] a pedant point! [victim] thanks you kindly.
perfect		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is perfect! [victim] isn't so sure.
phone		[MUSHer] phones [victim] for 4 hours! [victim] bets the telephone bill will be a bit big!
pillow		[MUSHer] picks up a pillow and thwaps [victim]! [victim] is covered in feathers!!
pinch		[MUSHer] pinches [victim]! [victim] is pinched!
ping		[MUSHer] pings [victim] to see if he is alive! [victim] replies "I'm alive! I'm alive!"
pizza		[MUSHer] senses [victim] is in dire need of gastronomic ecstasy! [victim] is forcefed pizza by [MUSHer] until he can take no more!
poconos		[MUSHer] poconos [victim]! [victim] 's nose has been poked.
poke		[MUSHer] pokes [victim]! [victim] is poked!
poisonous		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and says "Quite poisonous!"! [victim] doesn't eat it, then.
ponder		[MUSHer] ponders the %p %s substitutions to [victim]! [victim] thinks [MUSHer] has too much time on his hands...
poo		[MUSHer] poos [victim]! [victim] is pooed!
pop		[MUSHer] pumps [victim] full of air then spikes him with a pin! [victim] whizzes around the room!
pout		[MUSHer] sticks out his lip and pouts to [victim]! [victim] feels just awful for him.
pringle		[MUSHer] waves the green pringles tube towards [victim]! [victim] grabs one!
puke		[MUSHer] pukes at [victim]! [victim] is completely disgusting!
pulp		[MUSHer] sings "Something Changed" to [victim]! [victim] taps his foot approvingly.
pummel		[MUSHer] pummels [victim]! [victim] is pummelled!
purr		[MUSHer] rubs around [victim]'s legs purring loudly! [victim] scratches behind [MUSHer]'s ears!
push		[MUSHer] pushes [victim]! [victim] takes two steps back and trips over.
Q
R
razzle		[MUSHer] sticks out his tongue and razzleberries at [victim]! [victim] gets all wet!
rescue		[MUSHer] rushes to rescue [victim]! [victim] is happy to be rescued by him!
rpg		[MUSHer] points his RPG at [victim] from the distance and pulls the trigger! [victim] eeks before exploding into pieces as the rocket makes contact.
rub		[MUSHer] rubs [victim]'s tummy!! [victim] is a tummyslut !
run		[MUSHer] runs away from [victim]! [victim] gives chase.
S
santa		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] looks kinda silly in his santa outfit! [victim] feels kinda silly too!
sarcasm		[MUSHer] was actually being sarcastic there, [victim]! [victim] apparently didn't realise.
sbd		[MUSHer] waggles his SBD at [victim]! [victim] hears the SBD go "Bzzzzzzzting!"
scratch		[MUSHer] scratches [victim]! [victim] ooohs a big sigh of relief!
seduce		[MUSHer] attempts to seduce [victim]! [victim] falls completely in love with [MUSHer].
shaddap		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and cries "Ah, shaddap!"! [victim] shuts up.
sheep		[MUSHer] yells "SHEEEEEEEPP" at [victim]! [victim] baaaas
shh		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] and hisses "Shhhhh!"! [victim] shuts up.
shrug		[MUSHer] shrugs at [victim]! [victim] doesn't know either.
sigh		[MUSHer] sighs at [victim]! [victim] feels sorry for [MUSHer].
simplyred		[MUSHer] plays [victim] all the Simply Red tracks a hundred times over! [victim] thanks [MUSHer]!
sing		[MUSHer] sings a lullaby to [victim]! [victim] falls asleep in [MUSHer]'s arms!
slap		[MUSHer] slaps you REALLY hard [victim]! [victim] is hurt awwwwwwww........
smash		[MUSHer] throws a stone at [victim]! [victim] shatters in to lots of pieces!
smile		[MUSHer] smiles at [victim]! [victim] is dazzled by his teeth!!
smooch		[MUSHer] smooches [victim]! [victim] is smooched hard on the lips.
snap		[MUSHer] snaps [victim]'s fingers in a mousetrap! [victim] yelps in pain!
sneer		[MUSHer] sneers at [victim]! [victim] is but a lowly worm in comparison to the great [MUSHer]!
sneeze		[MUSHer] sneezes at [victim]! [victim] passes you a handkerchief.
sniffle		[MUSHer] wrinkles his nose up and snuffles sadly at [victim]! [victim] is sorry.
snog		[MUSHer] snogs [victim]! [victim] is utterly snoggable!!!
snowball		[MUSHer] throws a large snowball at [victim]! [victim] eeeeeks as cold snow goes down his neck !
snug		[MUSHer] snugs [victim]! [victim] snuggles!!
snugguddle		[MUSHer] snugguddles [victim]! [victim] is snugguddled!!
sob		[MUSHer] sobs at [victim]! [victim] hands [MUSHer] a tissue.
sock		[MUSHer] points a wavering finger at [victim]'s back and screams "SOCK"! [victim] looks warily over his shoulder.
sol		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is SOL! [victim] LOL!
sorry		[MUSHer] sorries to [victim]! [victim] considers accepting his apology.
space		[MUSHer] s p a c e s o u t t h e l e t t e r s f o r [victim]! [victim] c a n ' t r e a d t h i s e i t h e r !
spam		[MUSHer] recommends the spam with bacon to [victim]! [victim] will have "Spam and eggs with a side order of spam!"
spank		[MUSHer] spanks [victim]! [victim] squeals with pleasure!
splan		[MUSHer] says "Splan" to [victim]! [victim] feels all SPLAN!!!
splat		[MUSHer] throws a custard pie at [victim]! [victim] is hit full on by a custard pie !
splendid		[MUSHer] says "Splendid" to [victim]! [victim] thinks so too.
splun		[MUSHer] spluns [victim]! [victim] gets a pound of splun right between the eyes!!
spod		[MUSHer] calls [victim] a spod!! [victim] seems suitably offended by that remark!
squeak		[MUSHer] squeaks at [victim]! [victim] squeaks right back!
squeeze		[MUSHer] squeezes [victim]! [victim] is thoroughly squeezable!
starwars		[MUSHer] says "All fighters lock X-foils in attack position and report in!" to [victim]! [victim] says "Red 5 standing by!"
stay		[MUSHer] begs for [victim] to stay! [victim] isn't going anywhere.
sue		[MUSHer] sues [victim] for sexual harrasment! [victim] settles out of court.
surreal		[MUSHer] turns to [victim] - "Would you like a imitation sprout?" he giggles! [victim] looks suitably baffled.
suspect		[MUSHer] is suspicious of [victim]! [victim] grins evilly and tries to look innocent!
sweep		[MUSHer] sweeps [victim]! [victim] is swept into [MUSHer]'s arms. [victim] wraps his arms around [MUSHer] and smiles dreamily into his eyes.
swink		[MUSHer] swinks at [victim]! [victim] swinks right back atcha!
T
tango		[MUSHer] tangos [victim]! [victim] is tangoed!!
tarot		[MUSHer] deals a Tarot card to [victim]! [victim] receives "The Queen of Cups"
tdf		[MUSHer] measures the Tait-Davis Field fluctuations around [victim]! [victim] produces a reading of 7.2%.
tea		[MUSHer] swiftly brews up a mug of tea for [victim]! [victim] sips it vaguely.
thank		[MUSHer] heartily thanks [victim]! [victim] says "You're welcome!"
thbbt		[MUSHer] sticks his tongue out and makes a thbbt noise at [victim]! [victim] has been put in his place!
things		[MUSHer] aligns the things for [victim]! [victim] 's things become aligned pertaining thusly!
threaten		[MUSHer] threatens [victim] menacingly! [victim] trembles in his shoes.
thwap		[MUSHer] thwaps [victim]! [victim] is thwapt!
tickle		[MUSHer] tickles [victim]! [victim] giggles!!
tie		[MUSHer] ties [victim]! [victim] struggles and tries to escape!!
toss		[MUSHer] tosses a Hershey's kiss to [victim]! [victim] thinks this is the best kiss he's ever received.
travel		[MUSHer] travels miles just to visit [victim]! [victim] is really impressed by that!
tscch		[MUSHer] tscchs at [victim]! [victim] shrugs weakly.
tuck		[MUSHer] tucks [victim] in and kisses him good night! [victim] is warm and snug under the covers.
tummyrub		[MUSHer] rubs [victim]'s tummy!! [victim] smiles and likes it when ya do that.
tut		[MUSHer] says "tut tut" disapprovingly to [victim]! [victim] sorries apologetically.
twirl		[MUSHer] takes [victim]'s hand and twirls! [victim] spins until he's dizzy!
U
ufo		[MUSHer] takes [victim] UFO-spotting! [victim] watches the skies.
V
valentine		[MUSHer] wishes a Happy Valentines Day to [victim]! [victim] blushes and smiles "Thank you."
W
waa		[MUSHer] waaaaas at [victim]! [victim] waaaaas back at you.
wait		[MUSHer] waits patiently for [victim] to do something! [victim] thinks [MUSHer] could be waiting a long time.
wake		[MUSHer] shouts "WAKE UP" at [victim]! [victim] jumps out of bed as fast as he can!
warm		[MUSHer] warms [victim]! [victim] 's fingers start to thaw.
wave		[MUSHer] waves at [victim]! [victim] does the wave!
weave		[MUSHer] weaves a wicker basket for [victim]! [victim] looks very impressed!
wedgie		[MUSHer] gleefully snatches a handful of underwear, ruthlessly wrenching them up to astonishing heights as he wedgies [victim]! [victim] howls in pain.
whap		[MUSHer] whaps [victim]! [victim] is whapped!
whee		[MUSHer] runs around [victim] screaming "wheeeeeeeeeeee!"! [victim] is completely baffled as to why anyone would want to do that!
whip		[MUSHer] whips [victim]! [victim] yelps with pleasure!
wiggle		[MUSHer] wiggles his bum at [victim]! [victim] wiggles his right back at you!
wink		[MUSHer] winks at [victim]! [victim] winks back playfully.
wishhere		[MUSHer] wishes [victim] were here! [victim] does too.
wonderful		[MUSHer] thinks that [victim] is absolutely wonderful! [victim] blushes hopelessly.
woo		[MUSHer] woo woos at [victim]! [victim] woo woos back!
woof		[MUSHer] looks up and barks "Woof!" at [victim]! [victim] pats [MUSHer] on the head "Good dog!"
work		[MUSHer] thinks [victim] should be doing some work! [victim] probably should be, yes.
worry		[MUSHer] worries about [victim]! [victim] thanks you for your concern.
worship		[MUSHer] worships [victim]! [victim] thinks [MUSHer] must be on something.
wpistol		[MUSHer] pulls out a water pistol and soaks [victim]! [victim] is drenched in water !!
X
xfile		[MUSHer] stamps "X-File #78010" on [victim]'s forehead! [victim] trusts no-one.
xmas		[MUSHer] wishes [victim] a merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!! [victim] smiles "Same to you!"
Y
yay		[MUSHer] yays at [victim]! [victim] is way cool!
yo		[MUSHer] sez 'YO!' to [victim]! [victim] chills and sez 'YO!' back.
Z
zerbert		[MUSHer] zerberts [victim]! [victim] feels his bellybutton go, "ZING!"
zztop		[MUSHer] sings the entire ZZ Top back catalogue to [victim]! [victim] pleads for mercy!!

Actions marked with a small ball ( ball

) are a little different in that the response is variable. Each time the global is used, a different response (example shown in italic) is seen. For example, 'heart' gives "HUG ME", "KISS ME", "LOVE ME" etc... you never know whats coming next!

The jukebox global can now have an extra qualifier for selecting a specific song. A simple example of its use:
jukebox Helix/19 Ian dedicates a jukebox song to Helix! Helix listens as it plays #19 - "As Heaven Is Wide" by Garbage.

Thanks to Ian for compiling this extensive listing!

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